lauri (_empty_scars) wrote in its_not_so_easy,

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"new comer" survey deal..

Name? lauri
Age? 17
Do you cut? yes
Who knows about it? a few friends.. most people think i've stopped
Have you ever tried to commit suicide before? no
Where do you usually cut? wrist.. legs.. hips..
When you cut, who's usually the first to find out? pete.. then kel/ kimmie then allie
What's your worst experience with a fresh cut? hmm.. warped tour pit... new cuts.. all got reopened.
Do you have a fascination with scabs? kinda
Do you like scars, yes or no? yeah
Do you name your razor? nope
What other methods of SI do you use? burning..
Do you dislike the term "self mutilation"? immensly.. i dont think it's mutilation.. i think that in the end.. it's something we learn a lesson from, and the scars will always be a reminder to us of the things we've learned
What various ways do you use to hide cuts? clothes, and bracelets,
Once cuts heal, do you still hide the scars? sometimes..
Ever been institutionalized/hospitalized for SI'ing? nope
Do you ever run into problems with hiding cuts (i.e: gym change rooms)? during school.. i hafta rush to get changed for gym.. i dont want people to see the scars or fresh cuts because i know it'll end badly
What's the best part about cutting to you? the fact that it gets all the pain i've been feeling to go away
Do you know of any songs that talk about SI? yeah.. theres a dashboard confessional song.. i cant remember what it's called though
What instrument do you use to cut? razor blade, exacto knife, knives in general, i've used a tac.. annd a safety pin once
What causes you to cut? feelings.. of lonliness.. like i don't matter to the people who matter to me,
What do you feel afterwards? relieved for a minute.. but then.. i get the ultimate guilt that doesnt go away until the cut heals
What is your closest Close Call? my *now ex* boyfriend walked in the room while i was cutting.. it was dark though so he didnt notice.. buut.. i pretty much threw the blade across the room
How long have you been doing it? a couple years.. idk.. 3.. maybe 4..
Do you keep a razor in your bag? nah.. but i've got pins and.. safety pins galore
Ever needed stitches for a cut so deep? no
Do you have someone like a therapist you talk to regularly? just my friends.. who are therapists enough
Do you have any other disorders not associated with SI? nah
so.. yeah.. that's me..
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